Tuesday, 25 February 2014

45 LIFE LESSONS, WRITTEN BY A 90 YEAR OLD

1. Life isn’t fair, but it’s still good.
2. When in doubt, just take the next small step.
3. Life is too short not to enjoy it.
4. Your job won’t take care of you when you are sick. Your friends and family will.
5. Don’t buy stuff you don’t need.
6. You don’t have to win every argument. Stay true to yourself.
7. Cry with someone. It’s more healing than crying alone.
8. It’s OK to get angry with God. He can take it.
9. Save for things that matter.
10. When it comes to chocolate, resistance is futile.
11. Make peace with your past so it won’t screw up the present.
12. It’s OK to let your children see you cry.
13. Don’t compare your life to others. You have no idea what their journey is all about.
14. If a relationship has to be a secret, you shouldn’t be in it.
15. Everything can change in the blink of an eye… But don’t worry; God never blinks.
16. Take a deep breath. It calms the mind.
17. Get rid of anything that isn’t useful. Clutter weighs you down in many ways.
18. Whatever doesn’t kill you really does make you stronger.
19. It’s never too late to be happy. But it’s all up to you and no one else.
20. When it comes to going after what you love in life, don’t take no for an answer.
21. Burn the candles, use the nice sheets, wear the fancy lingerie. Don’t save it for a special occasion. Today is special.
22. Overprepare, then go with the flow.
23. Be eccentric now. Don’t wait for old age to wear purple.
24. The most important sex organ is the brain.
25. No one is in charge of your happiness but you.
26. Frame every so-called disaster with these words, ‘In five years, will this matter?’
27. Always choose Life.
28. Forgive but don’t forget.
29. What other people think of you is none of your business.
30. Time heals almost everything. Give Time time.
31. However good or bad a situation is, it will change.
32. Don’t take yourself so seriously. No one else does.
33. Believe in miracles.
34. God loves you because of who God is, not because of anything you did or didn’t do.
35. Don’t audit life. Show up and make the most of it now.
36. Growing old beats the alternative — dying young.
37. Your children get only one childhood.
38. All that truly matters in the end is that you loved.
39. Get outside every day. Miracles are waiting everywhere.
40. If we all threw our problems in a pile and saw everyone else’s, we’d
grab ours back.
41. Envy is a waste of time. Accept what you already have, not what you think you need.
42. The best is yet to come…
43. No matter how you feel, get up, dress up and show up.
44. Yield.
45. Life isn’t tied with a bow, but it’s still a gift.
#CULLED

Monday, 24 February 2014

Promises with Pay-offs




1.Promise: If you learn from your mistakes and then let them go
Payoff...you will be able to focus on the present.

2. Promise: If you rise above the pettiness of people and annoyances...
Payoff:...you will be able to give your energy to the important things.


3.Promise: If you take time forphysical rest,spiritual reflection and relaxing recreation...
Payoff...You will be able to think clearly and energetically.

4.Promise:If you enjoy today and all it has to offer...
Payoff:...you will be better prepared for tomorrow

5.Promise:If you express gratitude to God and others through words and actions...
Payoff:...you will be aware of the value they bring to you.


6.Promise: If you give more than you receive...
Payoff:...you will contribute to the society,surprise your spouse,and model for your children

#culled fromThe Choice is yours by John Maxwell#

Sunday, 16 February 2014

FUNNY AFRICA PROVERBS...


Caution:Be mindful of some 'STRONG' words.
1. When hot water quarrels with the flour, it's the cooking stick that always mediate.
2. A monkey that eats grass instead of banana is a goat.
3. Getting married to a girl who weighs more than 80kg is polygamy.
4. When a tsetse fly perches on your balls, it takes great skill not force, to kill it.
5.However much the buttocks are in a hurry,they will always remain at the back.
6. If the throat can swallow a knife the anus must find a way of expelling it.
7. No matter how hot your temper is, it cannot cook yam.
8. The man who marries a beautiful wife and a man who plants corn by the roadside have the same problem.
9. The frown on the face of a goat does not prevent it from being taken to the market.
10. No matter how far you urinate, the last drops always falls at your feet.
11. No matter how much weed you smoke you cannot be the MOST HIGH.
12. One who sleeps with an itchy anus wakes up with smelly fingers.
13. He who urinates in a stream must remember his family drinks from the same stream.
14. The cow that is in a hurry to go to America will come back as corned beef.



#copied

Monday, 10 February 2014

The police is your friend,abi?

I just had to hurry up or I would be late for church.Gush!my make up was not done and my hair needed to be brushed. The sound of the horn made me gather my makeup bag,brush,bag and most importantly -Bible!To think that that people go to church without their bibles.Thankfully technology has made life easy,people now carry tablets ,ipads and other devices to church so no need for the hard copy bible again.

In my mind,I was getting prepared to be the cynosure of all eyes."Then go hear am!" was my motto.Journey to church was about 45 minutes.I used that time to polish up.Omo see transformation.We had gotten to junction and there was an error committed by the driver and this did not go unnoticed.There was a hungry police officer by the corner.Happily,he had caught  an offender and that means money must flow???

Quickly,he pointed his gun to the driver of the car I was in and beckoned to him to open the door.Without hestitating,the back door was opened and he got in.The next thing he said was that Mr Man,you are going to drive to my station.Go straight!

Saturday, 1 February 2014

Much ado about customer service!

So the other day I had mistakenly scratched off the numbers on my recharge card.In a bid to resolve this ,I called the customer care line.After several trials,I finally got through.The call was picked up by a man.He barely mentioned his name sounded more like mumbling and then the next thing that was audible was "This is XYZ customer care,how may I help you???".I started off by introducing myself and stated the reason for my calling.This was followed by series of personal questions relating to my number and then to that of the recharge card bought.It was annoying that after the long talk,the supposed customer care agent later referred me to visit their branch office closest to me for further assistance.

I had rushed from the close of work to beat traffic and get to XYZ network on time before closing hours which was 5p.m.Tension was rising  because I had met the annoying traffic I dreaded.I was wondering what to do next,trek or get a bike.Thankfully,the road started to clear and the bus was gradually moving.Yes!I got down at my bus stop and phew!still had to trek some few metres to get to my destination so I increased my gear to gear 5.



On getting to the network provider's  office,it was like 2mins before closure....Wow! I made it.The thought of coming back was not an option at all.The first person I happened to meet was the security man who directed me to sign up in log in book.I told him my issue and he directed me to someone who directed to another person and this very person directed me to another.I decided to enjoy the ride because it appeared that seeing one tensed up and  frustrated delighted these people.Finally I got to the next referral, smiled, laid my complaints,she seemed ready to help.But I noticed that she was  not different from the former.She had a nonchalant attitude.