Please don't Ma me!
The other day at the market while buying food items,the yam seller- a young man probably older than I am or possibly within the same age bracket as myself, kept on addressing me as Ma. Somehow it was annoying because he made feel like I was very old or something. I decided to respond by referring to him as Sir.
Personally,I don't like to be addressed as Ma by adults. If it were some primary or secondary school students and I was their teacher then that would permissible but for someone in my age bracket or obviously way older kinda appeared awkward to me, the addressee.
Maybe I need to put on invisible earphones because it sounds derogatory to me. After being addressed in that manner, I had to do a physical check up-did I overdress, was I sending the wrong signal, how was my body language or was I acting up? Everything was virtually in check!
For crying out loud,I'm not old now maybe older,yes. My own school of thought believes that Ma should be reserved for elderly women and mothers(not really young mothers per se ). Though this is a case of different strokes for different folks. The trend is usually to create an impression of aging. I have been in situations where addressing young mommas as Ma has been an issue.
Doing my industrial training some years ago,my supervisor, a young mother disliked being referred to as Ma. She preferred to be called Ma'am or Madam with the E i.e Madame. That was how she preferred to be addressed. It was not an issue and we got along very well. An elderly woman who worked in a daycare as a cleaner did not appreciate the fact that she was referred to as "Mama" even if it was clear that she was the oldest. The sound of "Big Momma" was her perfect name substitute that made her beam with smiles and carry on her duties happily.
Well...I am not promoting disrespect. Africans are very cultured and one of our values is showing regard for our elders. The only comma is when showing respect is in form of mockery or scorn. The whole essence of this write-up is to draw the line between sincere reverence and killing of the other person's morale. Typically,after this write-up ,I know excited some people who after sensing my grievance would continue with the trend to annoy me. My strategy would be to put on invisible earphones to act deaf to an address that I detest. Another way out would look at it in a positive light and not read negative meaning. But seriously,do not Ma me,its not funny! Does anyone get my drift,please lets rub minds...waiting!
Comments
If you want to address me 'respectfully', then just call me Miss...whatever my surname is or Madam, full-stop.
Don't 'Ma' me too!