Tuesday, 29 September 2015



    • You use the toilet without flushing.

    • You defecate in the bush along the express way
    •  You urinate by the roadside and by people's fences.
    • You throw waste from your vehicle or from inside a bus.
    • You think using swear words is fly.
    • You make noise while eating.
    • You don't apply what you learnt in school.
    • You go through school but do not let school go through you.
    • You scratch your groins in public.
    • You yell at the top of your voice when receiving or making calls in a public place.

    • You disobey traffic lights.
    • You take one-way roads.
    • You don't mind spitting anywhere and anyhow.

    • You are one of those guys that think a woman's place is only in the kitchen and that she is none other than a baby producing factory.
    • You blame the government for everything!
    • Add yours please...

Monday, 28 September 2015

" We are together" mentality

 Image source: www.sfu.ewb.ca
So you ask me what "We are together mentality" is all about? Well... It is a state of resting in your comfort zone because you have others like you-in the same state, predicament, zone, situation,problem, following the same approach....
I used to have this mentality but it has not helped at all. Realising that life is a sole race and I'm on my own has changed my mind-set.

Before now, it was when I'm going to get married and the " We are together mentality" reminds me that Sheneneh, Lerato, Paloma and Lagbaja are also not yet married so why make a fuss forgetting we are different individuals (even if we are within the same age group with different goals, stories, aspirations, journeys and destinations.

It is not just marriage alone. How about writing an exam and the performance was nothing to write home about. Would it be proper to throw a pity party with those of you that performed badly and use that to console yourself that after all many people failed so what's the noise and fretting about? How about analysing were one went wrong to do better in future rather than rejoicing that we are many that failed together.

How about going to work late because other colleagues have been doing so and keep getting away with it? The day you receive query or a sack letter then you might realise that you are accountable to yourself and responsible for your actions. Bad habits are easier to form than good ones.

There's another scenario particularly for ladies. You are in a gathering and you feel intimidated by prettier ladies. The “We are together” mentality would push one to relate ladies that one believes are their category (not so fine) so that the level of intimidation can be managed. It might not be appearance only; it could also be certificates or even exposure or knowledge or amount in bank account.
This is where I borrow the adage that" water get it own level". You don't want to fall your hand so it best you play safe and "belong". That way you know you are not alone!

"We are together” mentality is about comparisons in negative light. But coming to think of it making comparisons has never helped, or did it? Share please if it did.
"We are together" mentality does not motivate rather it encourages one to be complacent...do you agree?

Sunday, 13 September 2015

Yay.....Growing Old???

Image source: www.doomsteaddiner.net
"Only a fool does not grow old"
Yiddish proverb

Gbam! It dawned on me that I was going to be a year older in some days time. Like play, like play, girlfriend was gradually transforming into a woman. Apparently, the thought of growing old is not peculiar to me alone. You know that feeling that makes you feel that you are no longer young and active, fresh and vibrant but all wrinkled up and weak.It comes with advanced birthday celebrations. Then I dreaded hitting twenty. And then it came. Then I dreaded 25 and then it came. Now another landmark is fast approaching. The focus had been on how to turn back the clock, conquer age, beat it, hide it behind the mask...

Looking up my diary and all the plans I hoped to attain for every milestone left me wondering when they would all materialize. Being the youngest in my family,I am used to being in gatherings that I'm among the youngest but nowadays doesn't appear so. Girlfriend is getting older,hia!

The wishlist is long, no be small.Life makes us understand that there would always be people one is older than and others one is younger than.
I got to know what matters is not the numbers but hours, not the age but time. Time is life...
Nothing is so dear and precious as time(According to Rabelais). Not even youth, not beauty ,nothing at all.

Below are excepts from the book-Getting over getting older (by Letty Cottin Pogrebin)

What good is it to turn fifty with a wrinkled face if there is no light behind the eyes, no passion in the voice,  no new ideas happening inside the head...
Why hope to live a long life if we are only going to fill it with self absorption, body maintenance and image repair?
...When we die do we want them to say,
" She looked ten years younger" or
" She lived a great life"

Back to my long turachi.growing older for me is increasing in age number, fully accepting oneself, understanding ones body, being comfortable in ones skin, being wiser, more beautiful, knowledgeable and skillful

On the other hand, growing old according to my own definition is becoming filled with wrinkles, having hair problems, being weak and not flexible,slow in reasoning, loss of memory and giving up on being a better version of oneself.

Well you might not agree. But two people can look at the same thing and interpret differently. Life is all about choices. I choose to grow older than grow old.

Remembering that this the youngest I would ever be and the oldest I have gotten. So why shouldn't I live it up, learn, relearn and unlearn?

One day I said to myself:"I'm 20!"
By the time I recovered from the shock of that discovery, I had reached 40...phew!
It was not loss of looks but time.It was not fading youth but fading dreams...